I blogged a preliminary version of Caleb’s infamous house rules a long time ago. The list has grown!
There are lots of missing rules because I’m not sure even Caleb can come up with 213+ of these things. And while the numbers are allegedly arbitrary within the household, I kept track because – as you can imagine – Wynter kept track.
So, here they are – all the rules mentioned in the books with numbers if they have them.
Rule number zero – the one rule to rule them all – is:
House rules are immutable
That’s not to say nobody has never broken them, of course…
1 Only Caleb makes the rules
2 No secrets, no lies
3 No violence
7 Don’t start eating until everyone is seated
9 Don’t go into someone else’s room
11 No yelling inside
14 No swearing
15 Fill the tank on the way home
19 Knock before entering and wait for permission to enter
23 Wear a seatbelt
25 The driver picks the route
62 Never leave home without your tools in your vehicle
79 High school graduation gift is a filing cabinet
82 Don’t date within the industry
96 No phones while driving
212 No tattoos
213 No food fights
Elbows off the table
Shower every morning
Pick up after yourself
No door slamming
No smoking inside
No food in bed
Never give Dad cash
Two condoms in the wallet
Nobody’s motorcycle is better than anyone else’s
Save family drama until after rehearsal or soundcheck
Separate colors & whites
No open flames except in case of power cut
Let the girl set the pace
Dirty dishes on left, clean dishes on right side of sink
Don’t ask, don’t tell about lyrics
No phones while camping
No phones in rehearsal
Raw meat only on the red plastic board
Fake IDs are not condoned
No messing around at soundcheck
Don’t eat our pets
Show up sober
No girlfriends at rehearsal
16-year-olds aren’t permitted at college parties
Don’t walk around the house in a towel
Wear leathers when riding your bike
Swimming lessons are compulsory
Keep a spreadsheet of songwriting credits
Respect women
Don’t accept poor treatment or disrespect
Chores may be swapped but not shirked
No girlfriends on tour
* * *
Now technically, the following rules violate Rule 1, but some of them seem important so I’ll include them:
37 Have a safe trip (Wynter)
64 This Day In History is only to be studied on the correct day (Jesse)
The band does not play dubstep or djent (Indio)
The Silverado is not an appropriate place for pot pourri (Wynter)
Don’t violate the Code (don’t date your sibling’s friends) (Jesse)
Don’t go into your brother’s bedroom when he has a girl in there (Jesse)
Sara Creasy 